Day 6. Full Stop

I’m putting an end to this.

I told myself that Tuesday night would be the last time i’ll cry for you, i’ll see you, hug you and love you. I’ll make that happen.

Honestly, i don’t know who called you a “SLUT” on your blog, but honestly, when you told me that, i didn’t feel  single thing.

You being able to do this to me, made me ponder why am i still loving you so much… Made me think that everything that i’ve been doing for you is just rubbish… Until the day that you are having feelings for another, you can still ask me to buy this, buy that for you.. meet me and all… Well, that’s really heartless… TOTALLY!

You’ve got no emotions, no heart, no values… i really don’t know who you are! A slut?! Mybe i won’t call you that… But after what you’ve done to me, i might just call you a heartless freak!

I’m putting an end to everything, a stop to this, you can continue to b happy with your ex boyfriend whom you love so much and talk to him everynight till the cows come home, i don’t have and i need not care about it anymore. If you can be this heartless, why should i bother?!

Probably to your friends, you’re damn poor thing, to me…. For what i see and how i feel, NO WAY!

You are obviously neither repentent nor guilty of what you’ve done, so i’m not wishing you all the best here or am i gonna be like you telling me that you’ve got feelings for me here n that because i totally feel that it’s a truck load of NONSENSE!

I’m feeling so much better pouring this shit out of my heart now! I’m HAPPIER without you.

FULL STOP!

Troubled Waters…

What’s there to come if there weren’t choppy waters,

Won’t life be too simple if there weren’t any obstacles…

Wouldn’t you know what’s really precious to you after you’ve lose it…

Indeed, this week have been filled with bitter, sweet ,sorrow and lastly love, i really thank the people around me who made every single day a smiling one.

Well, it has been quarrels one after the other, one party just don’t can’t understand, the other has such huge ego… How are you gonna solve this problem?! These few months were really crazy for me… been trying to strike a balance between family, relationships and life… But well, i guess work took too much of my time, so much so that i almost forgot that i still have other more important things to deal with. Probably it’s the frustration, politics and also stress that made me so sick of everything…

You know what i wanna do now? I really wanna take some time off, go to somewhere far from this tiny island where i call home for the past 22 years of my life. Preferblysomewhere unreacheable…

Anyway, i believe that next week would be better, and i’m really looking forward to go out ltr with Baby Boy, hope things are good:)

Cheers to all.

Loves

Should i sign on….

Well, this question has been in my mind for a very long time… even before i entered the army up till now, 1 year since i enlisted… Many people encouraged me to, some say i’ll make it bigger in the corporate world, some say why not sign on for an iron rice bowl?! Well… on my part it’s contradictions one after another.

Kinda tricked my girlfriend a little when i was home today, asked her what if one day i sign on, how would she feel… guess what’s her answer? LOL!!

” If you sign on, i won’t marry you”… Woooo… quite touchy here eh?! *i honestly hope she doesn’t reads this post!! Wahahah!

Anyhow, to be honest, one part of me really want to sign on either in the Air Force, Army or the Police Force, i guess it’s just one side of me who really loves to be in UNIFORM.

To a certain extend, i felt that my life in the army has been really bumpy with lotsa ups and downs. take for instance, it’s like anyone’s dream to be an officer in the army, thus i really worked hard for my place in the Officer Cadet school… Well, i tried signing on in the Air Force, but i was rejected while my buddy got it… (Is it an indication that i shouldn’t sign on?!) So… i kinda gave up the idea of Signing on in the SAF until i went into School of Infantry Specialist or in short, SISpec… Well, kinda slacked there, just did what i needed to do, at the end of the course, i the best trainee for my platoon or what we call, PLATOON BEST…. well, i know my instructor has been pushing me to be the Company Best. but well, i guess my IPPT results wasn’t good enough to be the best… But anyhow, i still got into the OCS Crossover board. Marched in with a bunch of Soon- to be Officers, the question to me was: ” your IPPT results shows that you’re weak in running, so what makes you think you’re eligible enough to be an OFFICER?!” Damn… i knew it was yet another chance gone… like C’mon, is it so important?! tell me how many of your officers are currently having a GOLD for IPPT?! So yeah… another chance gone just like that and guess what? MY BUDDY GOT IN AGAIN!!… Jeez! (2nd indication for me that i shouldn’t sign- on?!)

So now i am here in GUARDS, still indecisive on whether or not i should sign- on or not… should i listen to the “indications” given to me, should i listen to the many contradictory advices or should i just follow my heart, i really don’t know…

Maybe it’s time to ask GOD… ask if i should or i should not… i’m quite sure my wife to be would hate me thinking this way cuz i’m very sure she doesn’t want me to… but still, it’s more about what i want in life… right Baby!?!

TELL ME!!! What should i do!?

I need the MONEY…

I wanna be able to contribute to my family ASAP…

I’m confused?!

So much about SWINE!

Yeah, so much about SWINE!! I was in a meeting yesterday with regards to the measures we should take as an responsible citizen of the Singapore Armed Forces. So the conclusion?! Take your temperature everyday. I’m glad that Singaporean are taking this virus seriously. I was flipping through the Straits Times this morning to check out the updates of the Swine Flu, and yes, Singapore as how “kiasu” we are…( which is good) are taking this very seriously. I heard from my colleague who went to the Changi General hospital today for a routine Medical Check- up telling me that the hospital is fully equipped with the neccessary machines, manpower and resources to conduct checks on every individual who enters the hospital premise. Inconvenience as it is, we have to sadly say that we are now back to the old days when SARS was killing so many people all around the World. To make things worse, our Minister said in his speech that this would be a ” long battle unlike SARS”  Well, i guess we just have to TAHAN the inconvenience and do whatever precautions we can to help with this epidemic.

Anyway, i am writing this blog entry with a blanket over me, sitting in a cold room while using one tissue on my other hand to wipe my mucus away… YES, i’m having a very BAD FLU!!!!!

My GOD! You just have to look like someone to be a CELEBRITY?!

Yes, i was checking out the news on Yahoo today when i found the most unbelievable news that can be on the headline!! “Obama lookalike from Indonesia in S’pore for Charity event”

Oh C’mon… then if just by looking like someone so so famous can make you so popular, I wanna be BRADD PIT

Check out the NEws!

SINGAPORE : Ilham Anas is better known as “Mr Obama Indonesia”. That is because of his uncanny resemblance to US President Barack Obama.

Since Mr Obama’s victory last November, Ilham has been treated like a celebrity everywhere he goes.

And he is now in Singapore, all in the name of charity.

Visitors to the Muhammadiyah Welfare Home Fiesta paid S$10 each to have a picture taken with him.

Proceeds will go to retrofitting costs of the home’s new premises at Bedok North.

And although a celebrity in his own right, “Mr Obama Indonesia” is still surprised at the treatment he gets.

He said: “I feel surprised that people are very happy to be photographed with me.” — CNA/ms